Diddy & Obama met like 4 years ago & this happened.
Happy Barack Obama Day.
-C!
Monday, January 19, 2009
another not-so-good-look for your boy Young Berg.
i mean.... its like.... i know its gotta be hard being young berg. the kid comes fresh into the music business and all that, had himself some good joints. like, you can't front, he had a few bangers. 'give you the business' was ill. now he gets no respect over ya know... Maino slapping him up..... niggas taking his jewelry and MAD people taking pictures with it, only for it to be fake jewels. even Ne-Yo said on the raido he wants to '3 finger slap' this kid. its gotta be difficult going thru this as an artist..... and then this video emerges....
-C!
-C!
Friday, January 16, 2009
damned if you do..... damned if ya don't
i didn't do it. like, seriously. i know that everyone that goes to jail claims their innocence hard body no matter what. but seriously, this time i really didn't do it. they put me away anyway tho. 2 nights & 3 days was the sentence. yeah i know it ain't shit but i saw so much people not even make it thru the first 6 hours. its so uneasy when your stuck somewhere for an extended amount of time not knowing what is going to happen to you next.
its wack as hell being in a situation where your at a place you don't belong in and you know it in your heart, but no one else wants to even fathom the thought of believing you. especially when they have to cover their own ass. like.... i went down on account of someone elses mistake. someone who actually has the power to keep me in and out of places like that. but i guess when its a 'your neck on the chopping block, or mine' kind of deal; obviously they choose the former.
i can't blame the system too much i guess. my actions prior to this incarceration may have indeed aided to this sanction to some degree and i'm dealing with that. i guess if i had to be angry at someone i should guide that frustration at myself. but thats not healthy. so with that said; i hold no grudges with anyone involved. i'm a forgiving individual. forgiving myself and others is the first step in my revenge. the second step is proving them all wrong.
i guess the worst part of all this for me is losing the respect of my parents. they worked so hard raising me and this is what they have. a fuck up for a first born son who waited til he was a grown ass man to have a teenage wild streak. i always felt like i never could please them. i never got any recognition or support for anything good i ever did. they only paid attention to the negative aspects of my life. and me being the fuck up i am, i kept feeding them shit to pay attention to.
i can only blame myself for that also. my decisions are just that; my decisions. good, bad or ugly these are things i have to deal with on my own, if not before then especially now. maybe i sound like some self-pitying sob story right now... maybe because i am. my self-esteem, my confidence, my self worth, is definitely at an all time low. i'd be lying if i said suicidal thoughts didn't cross my mind today. I AM NOT GOING TO DO IT. so don't freak out. but seriously, doesn't everyone contemplate killing themselves when things get really bad (maybe, maybe not; if not, feel free to look at me really really weird right now. i won't feel no kinda way about it)?
i know i'll make it out of this slump, most likely when i finish writing this. i just really needed to vent. i'm hurt right now. i feel like i disappointed my parents to a unforgivable degree. worst part is i didn't even do it. i'm going thru all this hurt because some dickhead at a courthouse mixed up my piss cup with someone elses. no one wants to hear that tho. idk. i guess harvey dent said it best, "the night is darkest before the dawn." maybe i put too much worth into quotes from batman movies..... maybe its just a good comforting thing to say.... or maybe its the truth, and around the corner i have some serious blessings coming my way. who knows. all i know is i have a lot to prove to a lot of people before i can start feeling like the old me.
i'm my own worst enemy and i have to retaliate to the abuse i've been giving me.
the best revenge is my success & i have a serious vendetta to fulfill.
-C!
P.S: to my girl Lauraisha, i love you. you always by my side no matter what. i'll give you the world once i own it. to my best friend Matthew, i love you too. blood couldn't make us any more of the brothers we already are. to my immediate family; Chris, don't be like your big brother. be better than me in every way you can & keep making mom & dad proud. M&D (they'll probably never see this in their lives for various reasons), i love yall. i'm a bonehead for a son & even though you guys have lost your faith in me, i love you. hopefully one day i can be fortunate enough to gain that back and we can reconcile everything between us. & Matthew. & most importantly your future daughter-in-law, el.
P.P.S: ayo t'day. happy b'lated. sorry i couldn't make your party tonight. tell them niggas A.C. is nice tho & imma catch up to em in a few months..... niggas in the pen keep callin me baby ye n shit like that.
its wack as hell being in a situation where your at a place you don't belong in and you know it in your heart, but no one else wants to even fathom the thought of believing you. especially when they have to cover their own ass. like.... i went down on account of someone elses mistake. someone who actually has the power to keep me in and out of places like that. but i guess when its a 'your neck on the chopping block, or mine' kind of deal; obviously they choose the former.
i can't blame the system too much i guess. my actions prior to this incarceration may have indeed aided to this sanction to some degree and i'm dealing with that. i guess if i had to be angry at someone i should guide that frustration at myself. but thats not healthy. so with that said; i hold no grudges with anyone involved. i'm a forgiving individual. forgiving myself and others is the first step in my revenge. the second step is proving them all wrong.
i guess the worst part of all this for me is losing the respect of my parents. they worked so hard raising me and this is what they have. a fuck up for a first born son who waited til he was a grown ass man to have a teenage wild streak. i always felt like i never could please them. i never got any recognition or support for anything good i ever did. they only paid attention to the negative aspects of my life. and me being the fuck up i am, i kept feeding them shit to pay attention to.
i can only blame myself for that also. my decisions are just that; my decisions. good, bad or ugly these are things i have to deal with on my own, if not before then especially now. maybe i sound like some self-pitying sob story right now... maybe because i am. my self-esteem, my confidence, my self worth, is definitely at an all time low. i'd be lying if i said suicidal thoughts didn't cross my mind today. I AM NOT GOING TO DO IT. so don't freak out. but seriously, doesn't everyone contemplate killing themselves when things get really bad (maybe, maybe not; if not, feel free to look at me really really weird right now. i won't feel no kinda way about it)?
i know i'll make it out of this slump, most likely when i finish writing this. i just really needed to vent. i'm hurt right now. i feel like i disappointed my parents to a unforgivable degree. worst part is i didn't even do it. i'm going thru all this hurt because some dickhead at a courthouse mixed up my piss cup with someone elses. no one wants to hear that tho. idk. i guess harvey dent said it best, "the night is darkest before the dawn." maybe i put too much worth into quotes from batman movies..... maybe its just a good comforting thing to say.... or maybe its the truth, and around the corner i have some serious blessings coming my way. who knows. all i know is i have a lot to prove to a lot of people before i can start feeling like the old me.
i'm my own worst enemy and i have to retaliate to the abuse i've been giving me.
the best revenge is my success & i have a serious vendetta to fulfill.
-C!
P.S: to my girl Lauraisha, i love you. you always by my side no matter what. i'll give you the world once i own it. to my best friend Matthew, i love you too. blood couldn't make us any more of the brothers we already are. to my immediate family; Chris, don't be like your big brother. be better than me in every way you can & keep making mom & dad proud. M&D (they'll probably never see this in their lives for various reasons), i love yall. i'm a bonehead for a son & even though you guys have lost your faith in me, i love you. hopefully one day i can be fortunate enough to gain that back and we can reconcile everything between us. & Matthew. & most importantly your future daughter-in-law, el.
P.P.S: ayo t'day. happy b'lated. sorry i couldn't make your party tonight. tell them niggas A.C. is nice tho & imma catch up to em in a few months..... niggas in the pen keep callin me baby ye n shit like that.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
more from sting 2008
yo! man a badman and me nahhh care about cuteness, but even i can't resist the charm of the youths. beenie man's 2nd set @ sting '08 was too ill to go unmentioned. enjoy. (hopefully)
-C!
-C!
addictive & destructive behaviors.
so due to the case i caught back in august, my life has taken a different route. as a jail alternative i'm in an out patient drug treatment program for 12 -16 months, a lil community service and my record is good; my debt to society paid. now in complying in such a program i absolutely had to quit smoking marijuana (bummer, right?). my time in this program must be clean and sober and they suggest that i abstain from any & every mood and mind altering substance; that means alcohol too.
now i do agree, that alcohol is a destructive thing that in excess over time will most definitely deteriorate ones body from the inside out. you see the active ingredient in alcoholic beverages is ethanol. a chemical found in every kind of gasoline. drinking is most certainly an addictive and destructive behavior.
....but dammit if it don't get the partyyyyy started ryyyyyte!!! you see, even tho i'm in this situation i can't subtract from my life then things that make me such a delight to the world lol. i'll put down the blunts and joints and bongs, but fuck you if you taking a drink outta my hand. i'm 23 & a half and dammit, daddy gots to live too.
-C!
P.S: notice how this post started sounding pretty educated and gradually dumbed down to the drunken stupor that i'm actually in at the moment. LOL.
now i do agree, that alcohol is a destructive thing that in excess over time will most definitely deteriorate ones body from the inside out. you see the active ingredient in alcoholic beverages is ethanol. a chemical found in every kind of gasoline. drinking is most certainly an addictive and destructive behavior.
....but dammit if it don't get the partyyyyy started ryyyyyte!!! you see, even tho i'm in this situation i can't subtract from my life then things that make me such a delight to the world lol. i'll put down the blunts and joints and bongs, but fuck you if you taking a drink outta my hand. i'm 23 & a half and dammit, daddy gots to live too.
-C!
P.S: notice how this post started sounding pretty educated and gradually dumbed down to the drunken stupor that i'm actually in at the moment. LOL.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Sting 2008
well listen, i know most of my readers don't really follow dancehall reggae music. i know a lot of you can't understand what they say because the dialect is so heavy. regardless of those facts, i must remind you that this is my blog that i share what interests me. i am of west indian decent and there is a whole other world of music that i listen to. with that being said......
if you haven't been living under a rock for the past 4 years, then you should be well familliar with the names Vybz kartel & Movado. these two dancehall giants crank out hit after hit year after year. NOW, they reallllllllly don't like each other and have been feuding for some time. at jamaica's annual Sting concert, this year they took stage in rare form; together. it was the most explosive battle since the beginning stages of Bounty Killa vs Beenie Man.
everyone has their personal favorites (i really support both artists but i'm more of a vybz fan... LYRICS!!) but you can view the footage and judge for yourself. with no further due i present to you...
VYBZ/MOVADO CLASH STING 2008 PT. 1 & 2
(excuse the poor quality of these videos but thats all that was availible)
if you haven't been living under a rock for the past 4 years, then you should be well familliar with the names Vybz kartel & Movado. these two dancehall giants crank out hit after hit year after year. NOW, they reallllllllly don't like each other and have been feuding for some time. at jamaica's annual Sting concert, this year they took stage in rare form; together. it was the most explosive battle since the beginning stages of Bounty Killa vs Beenie Man.
everyone has their personal favorites (i really support both artists but i'm more of a vybz fan... LYRICS!!) but you can view the footage and judge for yourself. with no further due i present to you...
VYBZ/MOVADO CLASH STING 2008 PT. 1 & 2
(excuse the poor quality of these videos but thats all that was availible)
Saturday, January 3, 2009
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